Its Such a Good Feeling...

It took all of me not to type out all the lyrics to the Mr.Roger's classic!

I've been in a wonderfully good mood for like the past two weeks and I don't know what it is or where it stems from. It is like being in love without there being anyone to be in love with. It's like something wonderful has just happened without anything outside the norm happening. It's like being in anticipation of an upcoming event without anything being on the schedule. It's like buying a new CD or a new pair of shoes (we all know how happy these purchases make me) without having spent a dollar. I don't know how to explain it better than that. I'm just in a gosh durn great mood!

I know that there are so many reasons that I could complain and be worried but I am tired of worrying about things that I cannot change. It was when I made that decision, to be happy, that this whatever took its place.

I was telling this to Rell over AIM earlier and he typed "good that's god." And I was like huh, "god is a feeling?" He was like "yeah, but I meant good that's good." And I was like ohhh. But now that I think about, he was on to something. Whatever this feeling in is like loving/being loved by a significant other. It's like something spectacular occurring. It's like the excitement you have when you are about to go to Disney World as a kid. It's like those things I buy to make me temporarily happy.

It is happiness. I am happy.

FEELING GOOD, FEELING GREAT!!!

Its funny...this time two weeks ago I was hating life and super depressed. But now I am super happy and so in love with life and God and everything thats going on! If you know my situation then you are probably asking "What's so great in her life?" On the surface it looks like nothing other than an extended vacay in LA (I have no job and I am broke!)
I've always known that I am genuinely happy person and that I don't need certain comforts in life to be happy. After living the life as a student for the past few years...this type of truth should be embedded in me but living at home for six months kind of had a sister spoiled!!! Happiness is not a new CD or a new pair or shoes or any of the numerous things I like to buy. Happiness is not even the new condo or convertible Mercedes that I am saving up for! Happiness is not Defiant Entertainment Group's first Oscar winning/blockbuster film (all though that would be nice!!!!) Those things may bring a smile and a happy sensation... Well honestly, those things might make a happy person MORE happy...but give those things to an unhappy person...then it doesn't mean a thing!!!
But I really feel like I had to go through my little depressed spell to realize that I am sooo blessed. There are so many people who love me and would do anything in their power to see me do well! Thats everyone from my roomie, to my family, to my best friends and my crew, to my DC family! Man! It feels sooo great to be loved! Then on top of that I get to LA and join a Young Adult ministry (having a great fellowship group is just as important as having an apartment!!) and they look out just like they have known me for a long time!
So yeah, things at surface level could be better. But I know that stuff is coming! Right now, I am good! And I get to go to NC next week to see my younger brother graduate from high school!!! Life is WONDERFUL!

HAPPY I AM!